Parental Advice for Newlyweds
Ah, the journey of marriage – a thrilling adventure filled with highs, lows, and the occasional stormy weather. For those setting sail into the seas of matrimony, the importance of a reliable compass cannot be overstated. And who better to provide that compass than the seasoned navigators of love and commitment – our parents?
They probably have a thing or two to teach us about how they found their spouse the halaal way. Parental advice for newlyweds is not spoken about enough – let’s normalise it!
I recently stumbled upon a comment about my book (Kismet – For roses to blossom) where a reader shared that the survival of Zainub and Ahmed’s marriage was attributed to the positive influence and sage advice of the mother-in-law, Fathima, who is Ahmed’s mother. This got me thinking about the often undervalued yet invaluable role that parental advice plays in the success of a marriage.
Let’s face it; the first few years of marriage can feel like you’ve been tossed into the deep end of the relationship pool without a life jacket. You’re learning to navigate the uncharted waters of shared responsibilities, conflicting schedules, and the occasional miscommunication that can escalate into a full-blown storm. This is precisely where the wisdom of parents can be a beacon of hope.
One of the key elements highlighted in the comment was the mother-in-law’s ability to offer positive advice without meddling in the day-to-day affairs of the couple. This delicate balance is crucial. Parents should be the lighthouses guiding the way, not the captains steering the ship. Their role is to offer wisdom garnered from their own experiences, not to impose their views or micromanage the couple’s decisions. Thus, we should all take care not to overstep our boundaries, and pay attention to the rights and responsibilities of every member of the household – husband, wife and in-laws!
Positive advice for newlyweds, in this context, does not mean sugarcoating reality. Parents (and grandparents, too!), having weathered their fair share of storms, can provide a realistic perspective on the challenges that may lie ahead. However, the emphasis should always be on constructive solutions rather than dwelling on the negatives.
One aspect that makes parental advice so invaluable is the generational perspective it brings. While times may have changed, the fundamentals of human relationships often remain constant. Parents can offer insights into enduring values, the importance of compromise, and the resilience needed to weather the inevitable storms that marriage brings.
The positive influence of a supportive mother-in-law (of both, husband and wife!), as highlighted in the review I received, is a testament to the power of encouragement. Having a trusted figure who believes in the strength of the marriage and offers unwavering support can make a world of difference. It creates a foundation of trust and security that allows the couple to face challenges together, hand in hand.
As we celebrate the role of parental advice in the success of a marriage, it’s essential to recognise that every marriage is unique. What works for one may not work for another, and that’s perfectly okay. The key is to appreciate the value of guidance while allowing the newlyweds the freedom to forge their own path.
In conclusion, parental advice for newlyweds is not just a token tradition or a relic of the past. It is a timeless gift – a compass that can help navigate the turbulent seas of matrimony.
So, whether you’re a newlywed seeking direction or a parent eager to offer guidance, remember that the journey of marriage is an ongoing voyage, and the wisdom shared along the way can make all the difference in the world.
Stay well, inside and out
Waheeda, a.k.a Waydi
P.S. If you appreciated this post, then sign up for my emails where I share more fabulous resources, mental health tips and wellness reminders.